Here's a belated post on what it feels like to be married for five years and being mom to not one but two boys.
I've come to believe that when God blesses a couple with children, He does so with a chuckle in His throat and a glint in His eyes.
Surely, nothing tests a marriage and one's character like becoming parents! It's been a funny and often heart-rending journey for us two jokers.
I don't think any pre-marital counseling course could have prepared us adequately for what we've been through particularly in the past 3 years.
Truly, marriage is so much more than finding one's soulmate, or enjoying a life-long companion, someone you don't mind spending happily ever after with.
In 5 years, I've learnt that marriage is just as much about:
Coping with the dismay of having yet another romantic notion about our other half dismantled.
At the same time, finding ourselves endeared to new qualities and virtues that we never saw, or would never have imagined ourselves being so utterly attracted to before - like skilfully managing the family budget, for one thing. Ha!
Realizing that when God gives us children, he thinks we need to learn patience. A lot a lot of patience.
And love our parents THAT MUCH MORE because now we know how hard it must have been for them to put up with our nonsense!
Acquiring a new father and mother, and learning to love them for raising a son to be the man he is for me to love so dearly, even if their ways are different from what I grew up with.
After each painful conflict...Marriage is about being on bended knees, and asking God, each other, and our children, for forgiveness, for the many many words uttered in a rush of anger and hurt.
And learning from each mistake how to be a better mom and dad, and hoping that no lasting harm has been done, that God's restorative love redeems and heals the brokenness.
It's being surprised and delighted at how we're capable of loving SO very much, beyond each other and our firstborn!
It's about learning to laugh at both the wonderful and terrible things that happen to us - the joy of having two beautiful children and the grief that accompanies each stressful episode with them.
5 years, 2 kids and a fair number of kilos later, this mommy believes that the one thing that holds this marriage together - is our total and utter dependence on God to provide, to comfort, to teach and correct, to restore and reconcile.
To my wonderful husband - thank you for putting up with me on this journey. And yes, I hang on bated breath to see what adventures God brings us in our next five years together!
D waits for Daddy to arrive at T3 Arrival Hall
And our 10-week old G