Friday, February 19, 2010

Each a face and a name among the multitudes

Traveling along the PIE this afternoon in a cab I suddenly had a morbid turn of mind. It happens a lot these days, Elroy would tell you.

I thought, in the event of a horrific car accident - don't ask me why I always think of this when riding in a cab - how would bystanders act upon seeing my horribly wrangled body?

They'd have to search through my belongings and look for my NRIC or my civil service card, or my phone to find the contact number of my next of kin.

These are the items tagged to my person that would give them a name to a "Jane Doe". Without them, I'm just another statistic. Faceless, without identity, among a throng of Singaporeans.

Without these tags that tie me to social constructs of citizenship and personal worth, is the harsh reality that I am just a little better than roadkill?

What about the thousands who perished in the World Trade Centre September 11 attacks? All faceless victims, remembered and known only by their mothers, wives, sons and daughters.

In such multitudes, I wonder how it is that each of us truly counts and matters.

Yet the amazing truth is that in the eyes of God our Creator, no such physical tags are necessary for us to be numbered, named, and identified.

No scrolling down the phonebook is required for God to recognize who I am, even though I am only one in 6 billion living on this earth. Not to mention the billions who have since passed through this life and into the next.

So here I am gazing at my two sleeping babies.

So very young, and full of promise.

And I hope and pray that they will never ever experience a moment of doubt in life that they are just a nameless face in the crowd, no matter what circumstances they find themselves in.

Wednesday, February 17, 2010


Wanted to post some pictures of the kids having a good time in Segamat with the maternal side of the family, but phone is refusing to successfully bluetooth the photos over, so I guess I'll save them for another post.

Will keep this one brief.

Found myself in two extremely uncomfortable positions all in one weekend. Firstly, we found money missing and I had to send our 5-month old helper back to the agency the very next morning. Second, a family tiff rended my heart almost in two on the night of CNY reunion dinner.

What stuck in my mind were these:

The T-shirt my helper wore when I sent her back to agency had the prints "Easy Come, Easy Go".

And the run-down, cigarette-smelling, cockroach-ridden motel that we stayed at in Segamat was called none other than "Harmony Hotel".

Tuesday, February 02, 2010

G is 5 months old!

I learnt today from Elroy who visited a psychiatric ward this morning, that there is such a thing as Post Partum Psychosis. A patient in that condition can totally lose touch with reality, and regress into an infant-like state.

He described this woman who gave birth in November last year. She returned to work and suddenly started speaking and behaving as though she was a toddler, becoming extremely child-like in her mannerisms.

While not as extreme, in some ways I've regressed into an infant-like state after going back to work in January too.

In that come 9.30pm every night, as I tuck the two boys into bed I find myself invariably succumbing to the thick ooze of sleep myself. Just so, so dead tired.

It seems between work, commuting to and from work, and the little snatches of time over dinner spent feeding the toddler and playing with the baby, there is just no more time and energy left to do other things.

What of weekends? Between the work weeks in January we've been shuttling between JB and Singapore to spend time with the Daddy who's based there this year.

So no more time to write too, for that matter - therefore why this blog's been inactive since Dec 09.

It's now Feb, and I think time to start regaining my wits about me... and not succumb to sleep and fatigue at the end of a long day. Hopefully will be more disciplined now to update the blog more often!

In the meantime, little G has grown and grown. While his big brother has started second year of school at BKK's nursery program.

At his recent vaccination, we found he is now 8.4kg and 66cm long, a whopping size compared to his brother at the same age!

Just look at this cutie!

Under his playgym:
Under the Play Gym

Tummy time (an old photo of G, then 4-months old!)
Tummy Time

During the weekend road-trips up to JB, the little angel sits quietly and contentedly in his infant car seat, enjoying the views:


May this mommy endeavor to be less sleepy and more productive in recording down how her babies are growing!